So today I finally got around to watching Teeth, and it was everything I expected. A brilliantly made black comedy.
SPOILER ALERTS, If you don’t wanna know what happens don’t read the italics.
So basically it’s about this girl who wears a purity ring and her and what seems to be a cult of followers have decided not to have sex before marraige. So this girl, Dawn, has a boyfriend who also wears a purity ring, but they decided it’d be a good idea to go swimming in a lake, and they get close and kiss, and eventually start canoodling. They get close to have sex but she decides then it’s too much and she doesn’t wanna sex it up, but the dude is too horny and is like “but I haven’t even jacked off for years” and decides it’d be a good idea to rape this girl. So she’s getting raped and obviously isn’t liking it, then her vagina cuts this dudes knob off. It’s hillariously graphic. So this guy jumps back in the lake, and eventually dies, but you don’t find that out until towards the end. Dawn, obviously shook up, decides to go see a gynocologist, and ends up cutting his fingers off. So now Dawn is worried but goes to this other guys house, who recently asked her out. They end up shagging, and she doesn’t cut his wiener off, so they’re both pretty happy. However she finds out while they’re bonking that she was a bet, she gets angry, and cuts his dick off aswell. So she’s pretty much worked out the teeth in her muff only cut when she’s upset/angry. So she then decides to shag her step brother and cut his penis off aswell. She then decides to bail, and hitchhike somewhere. The dude who picks her up locks her in the car and is giving her looks like “I’m proper gunna rape you” so the film ends with Dawn giving the camera this weird smirk as if to say “yeah, gunna chop his penis off too”
So yeah, it’s a pretty funny film and I’m glad I watched it. Kinda put me off doing the dirty aswell haha. Who knows what they’ve got in there. just imagin
e if it was real, I guess there’d be conciderably less rapes. The film also reminded me of “anti-rape” comdom things that I once saw for ladies. It’s basically a comdom (or femidom is it?) with spikes aimed into the fanny, so the penis can go in, but when it comes out it gets shreded. Grimmm. But like, I guess if you’re gunna rape someone, then you deserve a shreded penis at the very least.
So I’ve also listened to my In Rainbows Vinyl today for the first time. Our turntable has been broken basically since we got it, but I managed to fix it a few days ago so I’ve cracked out all my records. I had forgotten how good of an album it was. I don’t listen to enough music as it is anymore, so I thought spending an hour or however long it is just chillaxing and listening was worth my time. Nude and Videotape are still my favourite songs on the album. I still need to listen to the B-Side CD aswell, I’ve never even taken it out of the box. It’s stupid cause I spent so much money on it but I just seem to “never find the time” Which really is bollocks cause atm I’ve got all the time in the world. Ah well, nevermind.